Today’s woman amidst insensitive, selfish males…
Uzma Zafar
 

Blurt Out

Someone has very truly said that a woman never has a shelter she can call her own. First she lives in her father or brother’s house and then her husbands and is dependent on the same, i.e., all the males in her life. If she attempts to live independently, the males of the outside world, in the wider picture, threaten to rob her off this freedom and pleasure through pointing fingers at her character. The women get victims to lust and ogling of sick-minded men every day who keep forgetting the very fact that when they were born, they were so much dependent on their mothers who were also women, for the satisfaction of their basic needs. Not for a single moment their mothers looked at their boy baby with disgust, then how can the men hate women so, very much and live without cherishing the same in their life?
Just recently, an incident made headlines in the local news channels and newspapers, telling the sad tale of a sick man who had kept his 2 sisters and old father, captive in a small room, disconnecting them from the rest of the world, feeding them on meager leftovers, for 15 long years, ruining their lives as well as their mental and psychological states. After meddling with their lives so much, when the matter was brought before the media and the prisoners freed off the torture, the crafty and utterly selfish son and brother for a person, fled away. In another case that caught media attention, an elderly woman who had got foliage, was kept unattended for days and days, by the son and daughter-in-law, till she got bed soars.
There was a test case we studied in psychology, about Anna, who was the illegal child of some woman, who had been mercilessly raped by a lustful vulture. The mother, after giving birth to her child, was separated from her by her father, and after achieving the age of 9, the child Anna was discovered. As the girl was kept in dark, she couldn’t see in the light anymore, was really a jungle girl and gulped down the food after snatching with hands, jumped around like the wild and had muted shrieks she used for words. As she was brought out of her dark room and let to mingle with the civilization, she couldn’t cope and after 3 years, she died her miserable death.
In addition to such cases, there are many which are never really discovered and remain invisible to the media or the world’s eye. Such a case was recently gossiped about, in which an old man whose profession was to bathe the dead, was seen in a pathetic state. When asked by the employees of the bank he was a client of, he explained that some devil of a son and witch of his wife, had left the man’s old mother, alone at home and gone out to have a time of their life, for as long as a couple of days, without arranging any food or attendant for the poor lady and in the end, the granny of their kids was discovered as they made home, covered with long, white ants. And as the old man had to bathe the dead one, he had fallen ill.
There is yet another incident in which, some many years back, a young man who claimed to be her boyfriend and says, was interested in marrying the then 17year old girl, had had physical interaction with Julie. However, after awhile, Julie became distant from her boyfriend Omar and it was when she died in an attempt to abort her twins, as she had become 5 months pregnant, of course knowing that such a thing would kill her in the end, that she actually died, giving the punishment of unending guilt to the guy, making him feel how strong she was and how little he was for a man!
The ways of murder keep changing but in our male-dominated society, the women die a single death, every second. As a wife, they don’t even have the option, most of the time, to think, let alone voice their emotions which, by the way, are mercilessly laughed at, by the males of her home she serves. A maid servant is even paid for her services but all a woman does after serving so many years with a man, tendering her kids, fixing her home, is mockery of her words and actions, disgust at her very existence and threat of divorce to her, the moment she raises her voice or else, keeping a new one in her presence, if the husband gets tired of physically assaulting her. And to top it all, many a times, Islam is misquoted for having giving permission to the male to treat the woman as an object of his desire, top be used and thrown away.
For all the men out there, Islam says that the husband should talk things out with the wife, in a cool manner. If she does not listen, then the man has the right to hit her as an extreme measure but in such a way that she does not get a physical bruise or even a scratch on her body. If then even, things don’t straighten out, the man should kick her out of the room and in the end, his life, divorcing her, freeing her to live her own, but never is he allowed to physically, mentally or psychologically torture her in any possible way. On the other hand, it is on record that though divorce has been considered to be the most unlikely extreme in the religion, a woman has been allowed to seek divorce at even the tiniest of the reasons like she does not like the face of her husband. But the men twist and turn the religion to their advantage and the resultant is, a disaster of the humankind by torturing it’s most sacred species; the woman!
Celebrating a Mother’s Day and Women’s Day each year, adopting the practice as a fashion, is not going to lead us anywhere. Once a maid was being told of the harmful affects of not having intervals during pregnancies. She very harshly stomped that she knew it but it is her husband who needs to be talked sense into. Though she was not educated or anything but she could still tell right from wrong. A woman can judge from the onlooker’s eyes, how the man is looking at, let that be a guiding light, a guarding watch or an eye send her way in lust or disgust. Even the religion tells us to respect kids, women, animals and children but how can a man be so insensitive to his own kind, beats us all!
The need is, to make the boy children realize their mistakes, by the mother, as much as the girls are and should be trained in such a way that they grow up to respect women. Husbands should stop scolding their wives purposely before their male children, to humiliate their wives, thinking that this makes the male lot stronger as the act only shows the meanness and lowness of the man, nothing else. As for us, the knowledgeable lot, we should be scared of such instances and strongly apologize to the Lord for our sins as these all insensitive encounters are visions to the Doom’s Day!