A hat-trick of flops of Aish & Abhishek
From Noreen Aslam

Bombay—‘Main Ek Ghagh Aurat Hoon, Aur Main Ghaat Ghaat Ka Paani Peeye Hoon’. This is the opening line of the novel ‘Umrao Jaan’ written by Mirza Hadi Ruswa that compiles the voyage of a dancer from her abduction in childhood to her return to the same place. ‘Umrao Jaan’ was a famous dancer (Tawaif) of Lucknow and she was very learned in literature and dance. That was the time when sons of Nawabs used to visit Kothas to learn Tehzib (etiquettes). ‘Umrao Jaan’ is a historical character in the sense that it depicts lifestyle of the period of India’s first war of Independence. Cut to 2006. Director J P Dutta vouches to make this novel into a film and he also insists that this is not a remake of the one made by director Muzaffar Ali in 1981.
The question of testing a remake on the box office has resurfaced after ‘Don’. But, if ‘Don’ could manage to recover its cost, ‘Umrao Jaan’ may not as it doesn’t have a Shah Rukh Khan. This ‘Umrao Jaan’ was dreamt by J P Dutta some two decades back. He has lived this screenplay all through his career so far. His father wrote the script even before Muzaffar Ali had started making his film. So, it must have been written afresh and couldn’t have similarities. Of course, Muzaffar Ali’s film was a classic with Rekha’s marvelous acting, Asha’s mellifluous voice, Khayyam’s melodious music and overall an honest effort to present a historical character on celluloid). J P Dutta’s ‘Umrao Jaan’ is no less glamorous but the question arises if it’s worth watching?
When I watch it in a cinema hall of Old Delhi the film’s first show, I expect a large gathering of Muslims as the majority of them live in that area. Instead, I find a noticeable number of eunuchs who came their in groups to see Aishwarya as a Tawaif. The film moves on the same track in the beginning. A teenager Ameeran, daughter of area’s local officer is kidnapped by a goon named Dilawar.
He sells this girl to Khanam Jaan (Shabana Azmi) who runs a kotha in Lucknow. The girl hesitates to return to her past life but slowly starts giving in and uses her brilliance to learn Shayari and dance from learned teachers. She is given a new name of Umrao (Aishwarya Rai). Nawab invites a dancer from Khanam’s group to perform in her palace and Khanam chooses Umrao over her own daughter (Divya Dutta).